Sunday, April 5, 2015

An Open Love Letter

I sometimes think that I don't let you know how grateful I am for you, even though you're such a huge part of my life. So I decided in the pale, predawn hours of this morning that I would finally tell you that I love you, write the words and really think through what it is that you mean to me.

Leaving you is hardest part of every day, and I look forward to coming back to you for hours after; sometimes even knowing that I'll see you later that day, I look forward to tomorrow and throwing myself at you all over again.

I don't always realize it, but you are one of the most important constants in my life. Every night that I have to spend without you is uncomfortable at best, and sleepless at worst. It's only when I don't have it, that I realize how comforting you are, how you are always waiting for me with open arms, willing to hold my blood, sweat, and tears, every emotion, every mood, day or night, with nothing but rest and safety for me.

You catch my tears and warm my coldest nights.

The trust that I have for you runs so deep that I've never even had to consider it. I place myself at your mercy at my most vulnerable moments, when I'm exhausted, or euphoric, or lost, and you never disappoint me. It has never once even entered my mind that you might not be there, or that I might have any cause to hold back with you; you've seen every side of me, and the intimacy we have is so profound as to be casual and thoughtless.

You carry my dreams like newborn chicks, cradling them gently for me until I can come get them, keeping them safe.

Bed, you are my rock, and I will love you forever, no matter what changes we both go through, no matter where you happen to be, as long as I can envelope myself in your softness at the end of the day, as long as I know that you are waiting for me, I can face any morning.

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